Star Trek TNG: Time Slip
by Ariston-1
Summary: This is not a confession, but it is the truth. Now, the reason why it is not an actual confession? As that the second time around, it had never happened.
1. Chapter 1

_This is not a confession, but it is the truth._

_Now, the reason why it is not an actual confession? As that the second time around, it had never happened._

The Beginning…

I was fortunate that when I had graduated from Starfleet Academy, I was just twenty-one years old and with a hopefully, illustrious career ahead of me. Now, my specialty is Ancient Artifacts mainly due to the influence of my Uncle's ex-wife whom I had still maintained contact with, even after their amicable divorce. Basically as with many in the service, they had found themselves assigned to different places. I was posted to Starbase Earhart to await the arrival of my first assignment, which I was very excited about, the very Flagship of the Federation, you got it, the new USS Enterprise, otherwise known as '_The Double E_' by many. My Aunt, had been previously assigned to the Starbase as a researcher, the moment I had arrived? I was met by Aunt Claire with a job until the ship had arrived. The study of an Ancient Artifact discovered on a dead world by the USS Charleston and delivered to her lab, two weeks prior. Over the following four days, I worked alongside Claire as we both studied the unknown object and at great length, I rarely saw my friends whom I had been assigned with to the facility as I had become so engrossed in the mysterious and ancient object.

My rank, was Lieutenant Junior which I had loved at the time as I was the only member of the small group of four people, whom I had travelled with to the facility, to hold that rank. I was alone in Claire's Lab, finishing off my research. I chosen to recheck what I had believed, by rescanning the device once again with the Tricorder I had in my hand, this is where things become a little crazy. There was a low pitched humming sound, which had emanated from the device and suddenly, everything went black. The next thing I knew? I awoke on the Enterprise, with the Chief Medical Officer looking down over me with a slight smile.

I was confused, but I also knew the command staff of the Enterprise by reputation alone. Hell, everyone in the fleet knows their names and could easily pick them out of a crowd, due to their legends alone. I thought that I must have blacked out and during which time? I was taken aboard the Enterprise and into sickbay. I could never have imagined what was to follow. I had no idea, that I would have been known by the crew, hell? Everyone called me by my chosen name. You see, I was named after my mother, Amanda Rider. Which made me Amanda Ryder, Junior. I always said that Amanda was my mother's name, so I had always chosen to be called by my last name.

"You gave us quite a scare, Lieutenant. That jolt you took, threw you across the room"

"What, what Jolt. Doctor?" I asked with confusion, slowly as the room seemed to spin around me.

"From the Artifact that you where studying. Do you remember?"

"Of course. I just, don't remember boarding Enterprise"

"We beamed you out, the instant we got the call. You are very lucky, Ryder"

"Tell that, to my headache" I said with a slight smile, before the Doctor injected me with medicine and my headache slowly cleared.

"I'd like to keep you in sickbay for observation…"

"Thanks to your care? I'm fine. I should report in, to the First Officer. Let him know I'm on board"

"Ryder, are you feeling okay?" The Doctor asked, instantly.

"Thank you Doctor, I am fine. Regulations state that new recruits, must report directly to the First Officer, for assignment"

The moment I had mentioned '_First Officer_', in reference to Commander William T. Riker, the Doctor's face instantly turned stone cold, as had those around me as I looked around the room, before seeing a sheet covering a body.

"Doctor, what the hell is going on. Why is everyone looking at me like that?" I asked slowly, as I stepped from the Bio-bed, as my legs shook.

"New, new recruit, Lieutenant? That energy Jolt, must have hit you harder than we though. Ryder, you've been on board of the Enterprise, for over three years"

"No, that's not possible. I was just at Starbase Earhart, awaiting Enterprise to arrive. What is going on here, who is the body?"

"Ryder, you honestly don't remember the away mission. The mission that you lead last night?" Doctor Crusher asked, instantly.

"Away mission, what away mission? What the hell are you talking about?"

I had no idea how, nor why, but the body beneath the sheet was in fact, Commander William Thomas Riker, the First Officer of the USS Enterprise. What I had later learned, was that I had been granted the right to lead my first true away mission to the surface of a planet to study a newly discovered, ancient artifact and Commander Riker, had merely came along to assess myself on my first lead mission. It had appeared that whilst studying a large machine of some form, an energy surge had exploded from the device to impact a nearby piece of machinery, a column like device, during which time? A second ribbon of energy had exploded directly towards myself, I was hit in my chest and thrown across the room. Reports from the other members of the away team, which I was leading at the time? Had stated that I was sent into some form of phase, in and out of existence for a moment, before I not only hit, but traveled through Commander Riker, killing him instantly.

I had spent, two days in sickbay as I was studied by the medical and science staff of the Enterprise, before I was finally cleared to return to my quarters, even though my memories of that incident, where not present. My lack of memories of the past three years, where put down to the trauma of the incident. I had seemingly blocked everything out from Starbase Earhart, and my service to the Enterprise, even earning a promotion to full Lieutenant. As if things hadn't been strange enough? More was sure to follow as I stepped into the quarters which I had been assigned.

I stepped, slowly into the door of my assigned quarters to see a number of bags, packed before the door and a tall and very attractive, dark haired man stood inside of those quarters, his head hung low as stepped towards me.

"Ryder, are you okay? Crusher told me what happened"

"Who, who are you?"

"She said that your memories of the last three years, are gone. I'm Paul. And for the last two years, we've been together…"

"Together, as in dating" I said in shock, as I studied his face.

"No Ryder, as in engaged to be married. I know it's unfair to tell you this in your present condition, but I'm leaving"

"P-Paul, please wait. I honestly don't remember anything. If, if we've been together. Have I done something wrong?" I asked slowly, while trying to understand what was happening to me at that moment.

"No, you've done nothing wrong Ryder. But, I have. I can't put you through that, not in this condition. I've been seeing someone else, Ryder. I was planning on leaving you, hell. I already had my bags packed…"

"I suppose that I should say, thank you for being honest. Well then, I won't stop you"

"You don't have to be this cold, Ryder" He said, slowly as he picked up his bags.

"From my perspective, I've just met you. But, you seem like a nice guy, beyond the cheating on me anyway. Do you, do you mind if we meet up later? I have a three and a half year hole, in my memories. Since you seem to know me, perhaps you can fill in those blanks sometime"

"I am so sorry, I wish I could. I've taken a transfer to the Essex, it should pull alongside soon for replacements. But then, there is always Jenny. You two, where always close since the Academy"

Jennifer '_Jenny_' Wilcox. My former room-mate throughout the Academy, one of my closest friends, but she is here on the Enterprise? I had no idea, since the last I knew. Her assignment was the USS Arkansas. Perhaps there was another way to get some information on the last four years after all, from an old friend. You might say that I was taking everything, great at the time. But the truth is, I was terrified to my very core. Why could I not remember the past almost four years. The mood on the ship, the very morale on the Enterprise, was at an all time low, due to the loss of Commander Riker, whom had served with many of the crew for many years, since his assignment to the previous USS Enterprise. Although it wasn't my fault? I still got the feeling that I was being blamed for his death, by many of the crew. Hell, I almost tore that pour man apart when I passed through his body.

Life however, must continue and the loss of a single officer, although a heavy blow to the crew? Is the life of a Starfleet Officer. I was finally cleared to return to duty, for a short time at least. This, is where things became even stranger for me.

Finally, I had been cleared to join in with the investigation into the death of Commander Riker, as testimonies of those of the team, had cleared me of responsibility. Even though I had still felt somehow, responsible. Lieutenant Commander Data had assumed the role of First Officer with promotion, to Commander, as the next in line to the position. For myself, it was the first time that I had met the full command staff of the Enterprise, even though I was known by each of said command crew.

"… And as such, Captain? The explosion of energy which had impacted Lieutenant Ryder, had thrown her into and through, Commander Riker. Which had resulted in his untimely death"

"Thank you, Ensign" The Captain replied, with a solemn tone within his voice.

"Captain, I request permission to speak freely sir?" I asked, politely.

"Permission, is granted. Lieutenant"

"Thank you, Captain Picard. Although my last memory, prior to awakening? Was over three years ago. I have deeply studied my own file. As you may be aware, since I have been monitored by the crew of this ship. I would do the same thing, Captain. I have, seen the footage of the accident, studied it over and over again. I have spoken with many of the crew, I still remember nothing"

"Are you, going somewhere with this Lieutenant?" Called out Doctor Crusher, slowly.

"When I was assigned, to the Double E? I leapt from my seat and actually kissed my best friend. I was so excited, she can testify to that sir, she is onboard of Enterprise right now. Now from my perspective? That was just a few weeks ago. As I had said, I have studied the logs on the assignment. Now, somehow? I had passed through Commander Riker's body, phased through his body, so to speak. Which had resulted in his death"

"We have all, seen the sensor files. Lieutenant Ryder" Commander Data, replied slowly.

"Yes sir. I am aware of that Commander. My last memory, before awakening on this ship, was studying a similar device at Earhart"

It was a long shot, the longest of long shots in history. But, somehow? I had peaked Commander Data's interest as he stepped from his seat and walked towards the computer screen, constructed inside of the bulkhead of the briefing room, to once again replay the incident in question.

"Commander?" Captain Picard called out, while Commander Data studied the video file at high speed.

"One moment, Captain. Please continue, Lieutenant Ryder.

"Doctor Crusher, has found nothing which would indicate memory loss, of any kind. Captain, what if it is not memory loss at all? If you watch the file, you will see that I am studying the device, with a Tricorder. As I was back at Earhart, in my aunt's lab, before I awoke here. What if, what if I was thrown forwards in time. To the moment I had awoke in sickbay? I would not have any memories of the past four years, on this ship"

All eyes, instantly turned towards Commander Data as he studied the footage, at speeds which had made me feel dizzy as it was running on a constantly loop. It was a blur to everyone's eyes, but to the Android Officer, the images had appeared as clear as summer's day.

"Captain, I believe that Lieutenant Ryder… maybe speaking the truth. Computer, replay time index, 010145.04 at one tenth speed"

I was living in a nightmare at that time, as was the command crew of the Starship as we had all watched the beam of energy, hit me between my breasts and into my heart, before throwing myself backwards and on an unstoppable course, towards Commander William Riker. The moment of impact, between myself and the Commander, Mister Data ordered the computer to move forwards, frame by frame. As the images responded, something amazing had appeared on the screen the very moment I had passed through Commander Riker, there was two of me. Two distinctively different, Amanda Ryder. One falling onto the ground behind Commander Riker, as another vanished.

"What the hell am I seeing?" Cried out the Chief of Security.

I instantly froze in my seat at that moment. I had seen that footage, countless times. It had all happened, so fast on screen. No one, could have noticed but Commander Data as he turned to look directly at me and spoke the words that I was about to speak, in that very same moment.

"Captain? If you watch closely. Lieutenant Ryder's hairstyle, changes in that one moment, when she had reappeared behind, Commander Riker"

"Not only hair length Sir? But the colour of my hair. I've spoken with an old friend, whom is assigned to Enterprise, a friend from the Academy. I thought nothing of it, as it was just a passing comment. If you look at the image of me, before the impact and after, as I am now sitting here? My hair, is paler on top and darker… the further down it goes. A stupid bet, at the Academy which I lost. I died my hair, darker red than my natural colour. The bet was to see, if anyone had noticed. In the three years since? It had clearly never been changed and has almost grown out since"

"We see that, now. Lieutenant" Called out, Doctor Crusher, slowly.

The meeting, with the Enterprise Senior Staff had lasted for hours. While the USS Enterprise had remained in orbit of the planet and the device, which had somehow? Sent me forwards in time. I was a Senior Lieutenant on a ship that I had never stepped foot on, although everyone had looked at me as if I was a murderer. I felt so uncomfortable on that ship, during my time on board. The day after the meeting, and after reporting once again to sickbay for yet more tests, I was walking through the corridors of the Enterprise on my way to yet another meeting with the Command Staff, when an Ensign stepped before me, with an unusual smile on her more than familiar face.

"They say, they say that you don't remember anything. Is that true Ryder?"

"Beyond Starbase Earhart? I remember nothing"

"Really, you remember nothing after, Amanda. Nothing?"

"I, I've studied my own file and log entries. They don't say much about who I am, now. But, I have studied yours. I'm so sorry, Jenny" I replied with deep sorrow, as I stood before my Academy classmate and friend, of many years.

"It was my fault, not yours. I should've accepted this offer much sooner"

"No Jenny? I knew who Eric was and how you where around him. If I could take those years back, I would…" I whispered, before trailing off, as I looked at my old friend with a growing smile.

"Amanda?"

"Take those years back? Answer me one question, please. What is your biggest regret?"

"Going to the Arkansas, rather than Enterprise. But, when you took command of your department? You brought me here. You requested me, personally Amanda"

"If you could do it all over again, would you chose Enterprise?"

"Of course. I love this ship and her crew. Why are you asking…"

"I'll see you soon, Jenny. I promise" I whispered as I walked past her, before she gently grabbed my arm.

"If you don't remember anything Ryder? Then we really need to talk. I'll come to your quarters later this evening, say twenty-hundred hours"

I got an instant feeling that my old Academy classmate, roommate and friend wasn't telling me everything, she was most definitely hiding something. Nodding with agreement, I finally made my way towards the observation lounge on deck one of the ship, where the Command Crew had been awaiting my arrival. Apologizing for being late, I finally took an empty seat as the Doctor slowly stood and walked to the view screen behind the Captain, as he turned in his seat.

"Following on with what Commander Data and Lieutenant Ryder had said yesterday, I returned to her last medical scan, taken after the incident on the surface. I found nothing out of the ordinary, until I looked further back into her medical files, the Lieutenant's last physical which was three months ago. As you can see? Her DNA profile is an exact match for what is on file. The is Human, and one quarter Betazoid from her Paternal Grandmother…"

"My Grandma was Betazoid, my father is half Betazoid. As you may know sirs? I have none of their abilities beyond an intuition, you might call it" I continued, with a slight smile.

"With the Lieutenant's assistance? I delved deeper into her genetic makeup. That's when we found, this…"

"Telomeres" Commander Data called out, instantly.

"Yes sir, my Telomeres to be exact. Doctor, will you please call up this morning's scan. Thank you." I replied, as a second image appeared side-by-side on the screen. "As I am certain that you can see, Sirs? The scan from this morning, indicates…"

"You are younger, Lieutenant Ryder" Commander Data replied, as he stood and walked towards the screen, to examine the images closer.

"Which is impossible, but those images have been confirmed. The reason why I don't remember the past three and a half years? Is because for me Sirs, it hasn't happened yet. Somehow, myself and let's call her Senior Lieutenant Ryder, may have switched places during my own life"

"Which would explain the phasing through Commander Riker" Councillor Troi replied, with deep sorrow within her voice.

"I'm sorry. I know you where both close, Councillor. Now, this is the part which I believe that the Captain will turn down, instantly. Because of it's ramifications"

It came to me in the night, actually. If I had been switched with my older self, then it would stand to reason that she would have remembered this very conversation and began to set up the experiment in the past as the two devices, where clearly linked. My plan, was to go back to the surface and retrace the events which had caused the incident in the first place. And once back in the past where I belonged? Await for the right moment to act, thus saving Commander Riker from a painful death and effectively, closing the time loop, or whatever the hell it was. The Captain, was less than enthusiastic about the idea.

"You are talking about altering the flow of time, Lieutenant Ryder" Commander Data called out, instantly.

"Yes sir, I am. But only a small part, the accident on the surface. Once the loop is closed? No one will remember what has happened, history will never record the death of Commander Riker on the Surface. However, there is a possibility that I may remember, I guarantee that I will never say anything, to anyone. I don't want to be known as an insane fool"

The plan, was beyond audacious, a plan which had taken four hours to convince the Captain of the vessel to put into action. With a small away team under my direct command and observed by Commander Data for reasons of recording the unusual away mission, in the event that I had not survived the attempt to return to my time and place of origin. There was one thing that no one had anticipated in the cave network, beneath the surface of that planet. The skeletal remains, of a human,


	2. Chapter 2

Beaming to the location, deep beneath the surface, it was the first time that I had seen the alien device with my own eyes. By comparison, I would have estimated that it stood, in the centre of a large cavern, roughly the same height as the warp core on the starship, high above. The deepest shade of black that I had ever seen, which almost appeared to shimmer with thin lines of golden coloured '_Veins_', that's how it had appeared anyway. In many ways, it had reminded me of a warp core. To the left and right of the tubular device, stood tall and thin towers, with before and behind the artefact, much smaller devices of unknown origins and purpose. I instantly knew that the two small devices, would be connected via the larger towers by a powerful energy source, once activated. Since it was in fact the tower before the team, which had caused the incident in question.

As the team spread out to further examine the five towers, a voice called out to me, the voice of a Crewman whom had been previously assigned to the first away mission.

"Commander, Lieutenant? You may want to see this…"

Stepping to the side of a young and eager crewman, whom had recently taken an assignment to the USS Enterprise during a previous crew replacement, my eyes followed the beam from her torch to the dirt covered ground, to see a shining piece of metal half covered in the dirt. An instantly recognisable object.

"That's a Starfleet Combadge"

"Indeed…" Replied Commander Data, as he stepped to my side.

"Looks like it's been here for centuries, due to the corrosion"

"Lieutenant Ryder? I've found something…" Called out another Officer, from the original team.

The combadge, almost fell apart in my hands when I reached down to pick it up, leaving only a small corner of the device. I gave my orders, to the crewman before I stepped towards the third member of the team.

"Bag this and those remains, for later examination back on the ship, please crewman?"

"Yes Ma'am"

Stepping towards an Ensign as he shone his torch light against the cavern wall, a more than familiar shape appeared. A shape carved into the rock of the cavern with a powerful, thin tool. A Starfleet symbol on it's side and pointing deeper into the cave network.

"Was this here, the last time you where here Ensign, the Combadge and the carving?"

"No Lieutenant, we would have seen both. What the hell is going on?"

"I don't know. But I guess we go this way, deeper into that cave"

"How can you be so sure, Lieutenant?" Asked the Ensign.

"The emblem is sideways, pointing like an arrow to indicate direction of travel, Ensign Thomas"

"Wow Data, you are fast" I said with a mocking tone, before smiling slightly. "When I was a kid, my dad used to draw the Starfleet Delta on rocks, mapping out a route for me to take. A little game we used to play"

Following a long and dark tunnel, which had led in only one direction, other than backwards. We stepped into a small cave, as the beam from my torch scanned the cave, I felt sick to my stomach the instant I had stepped inside and more so when I saw the remains of a human, lay half covered in the dust and dirt on the ground.

"Data!" I called out, instantly in shock.

"It is, Human…"

"Ensign, please check on the Crewman. No one touches the artefact. Am I clear?"

Once the Ensign had left the cave, I slowly stepped towards the skeletal remains with a deep sense of feeling cold and uncomfortable as Commander Data scanned the remains with his tricorder.

"Human, Female. Roughly…"

"It's me, Data. Or should I say, Senior Lieutenant Amanda Ryder…"

"How can you be so certain of this, Lieutenant Ryder?"

"I, I just feel it Commander"

The away mission, was called off as the away team, the remains and everything that we had found not long after, including a Starfleet issue tricorder and shreds of a uniform, was transported back to the starship for analysis. I just stood in the medical bay on an isolated section, looking down at my own skeletal remains, feeling frozen to the bone. I could barely move.

"There isn't much DNA left to analyse, the remains are practically fossilised. But, I had dated the remains as over ten thousand years old"

I heard almost nothing that Doctor Crusher had said in that moment, I just stood looking at those remains as lay out before me in the shape of a human form.

"It's her, it's Amanda Ryder, Doctor. There is no doubt about it"

"How are you so certain, Lieutenant?"

"I broke my right clavicle, when I was six years old, during a skiing accident in the Swiss Alps. The Doctor, was less that adept at repairing the break. You can still see traces of the break on the remains. Need further proof? A year ago, from my perspective and while at the Academy? I was training with a friend, swords and live blades. We thought they where just for show, until I moved to my left, when I should've moved to my right. Her blade, stuck deep into my right thigh, down to the bone. The, injury was deep and difficult to manage, I still have a small scar on my leg which I keep as a memento of my stupidity. Also, the bone never fully healed as I can clearly see on her remains. You can check with my current medical files, if you wish. But that is your missing Lieutenant"

The mission, was called off and I was stuck on a ship that I did not know as well as I should. I knew nothing of the crew around me, many whom had seen me as the cause of Commander Riker's death. A highly respected officer across the fleet. I must have stood, looking over my own future remains for god know how long, before I was ordered by the Doctor to return to my quarters.

I just sat, rocking backward and forwards on my bed for a very long time, unable to get the image of my own remains displayed before me, out of my mind, until the chime to my door rang. I was in no mood for visitors at all, I ignored the constant chimes until the door opened and my old friend, stepped into my quarters.

"Ryder?"

"Go Away Jenny, please? I'm in no mood for visitors at the moment. This, is a living hell for me" I called out, before she stepped into my bedroom with a smile, which had quickly vanished.

"Ryder, what's wrong?"

"Please just Jenny, leave me alone"

"Is this about Paul? I should never have gotten between you both. I warned you that this would happen"

"Wait, what? _You_ got between us. I must admit, I don't know him, at all? But I would never imagine that you of all people, would…" I called out, with a deep sigh.

"You honestly don't remember anything, do you? I thought you where just playing one of your games. You don't remember" Jennifer asked, as she sat on the edge of my bed, facing me.

"It's not what you think, Jenny…"

"It's difficult to explain. When you took over as department leader, you pestered the Captain on a daily basis to bring me in. Eventually, he gave in and had me reassigned to Enterprise. That was fourteen months ago. We worked well together, we make a great team. We would spend so much time together Mandy, on and off-duty, even working out. About two months ago, you where late for our usual tennis game in the Holodeck. I went to find you in the Lab.."

"I hate Tennis, always have" I replied with laughter.

"You're so good at it. But, you could never beat me. Let's just say that, that a spark had reignited in the Lab"

"An explosion, in the Science Lab?" I asked instantly, in shock.

"You could say that Amanda. I knew, that you knew that Paul was cheating on you. He had been for a long time, from what you had said actually. Amanda, the day of the accident? You where going to break up with him, to be with me"

"Wait, we both agreed at the Academy, that was a one time thing. You're lying"

"Oh come on Amanda. You could always tell when people are lying, that's why you make a great Poker player. Am I lying to you, now?"

"No, you're not lying. I've always liked you Jenny, and in every way. You should have come with me to Enterprise in the first place. I asked, no begged you to come with me"

"Amanda, what the hell is going on. Please tell me?"

A single spark of an idea, instantly echoed throughout me as I sat facing my Academy friend, as a large smile echoed over my face.

"Since Starbase Earhart, what do you regret the most. Just answer me, please?"

"Not taking Enterprise of course. I know it was only an Ensign position, but she is the Flagship… why do you ask?"

"If you could do it all over again, would you take the Enterprise offer?" I asked with a large, growing smile.

"Of course I would"

"I have, I have something to tell you. Now it may seem to be crazy, so let me finish before you speak. The reason why I have no memories of the past almost four years, is very simple…"

I had explained everything to Jennifer, and I mean everything which had happened in the past couple of days. At first, she thought that I was joking with her and later on, she thought that I was crazy. But, eventually Jennifer had seen that what I was saying, was the truth. More so since I had shown her the Classified footage of the incident which had brought me into this year and onboard of this ship, with no memories of the past three and a half years. Being a science officer herself, she had instantly begun to recognise that what I was saying was the truth, more so as she had seen the artefact on Starbase Earhart herself, and had recognised the design elements from the footage.

It was, just amazing working with her once again, from my perspective anyway. Throughout that night, we had worked out a plan to return me to the past. A plan that we had instantly taken before the Captain and his Senior Staff, during the morning briefing.

"Lieutenant Ryder, you do of course realise that you would be in violation of several…"

"Commander Data? I do Sir. But, I can fix this. This all started with myself, in that lab with that other device which I had inadvertently activated. On this end? My other self had also activated the parent device, which had accidentally killed Commander Riker and had brought myself here. Now, I can't do anything about the device on Earhart. But, I can do something about the device on the planet, in three and a half years"

"Sirs?" Jennifer called out, instantly before she continued in my defence. "If Ryder can change what has happened, close the loop as she has said? Nothing that we have said or done today, will have happened. The ship, will simply move on to the next assignment with William Riker, as First Officer"

"I can, I can do this Captain. I know how to do it now. Let me go back Captain, let me alter Riker's fate so that he will survive. I owe him that, Captain. Because, I killed him. Now let me save him, please?"

"Temporal…"

"If I fail, Temporal Investigations will have my head, on a platter. I know that and I accept that. I will take full responsibility. That's why I want to beam down to the cave, alone. I know what you're going to say sir? But it's the safest way. It's not just Commander Riker's life anymore sir, it's my own since the discovery of my remains on that world. It's our belief sir? That the artefact was designed to observe the past and return without altering what must be. Commander Riker, was in the way when that had happened. We where both in the wrong place, at that time"

"Lieutenant, your knowledge of…"

"I understand that Captain Picard. I give you my word, that I will not use what I have learned of this future of mine, to my own advantage, other than to save Commander Riker's life. That is the mission"

The temporal implications of what I had proposed, was incalculable by all accounts. No one had known that I had studied the missions of the Enterprise since my arrival onboard of that vessel. If I had ever been good at one thing, that was covering my tracks. A little trick I had once learned from an old mentor, my father. Against orders and after pleading my unusual case to the Captain and his crew, I beamed down to the device, alone. I must have spent hours examining the device on the surface, taking every reading possible over a constant and secured channel back to the ship. Everything that I had said and seen, had been heard by the small research team, back on the Enterprise.

I eventually stood in the right spot, activated my Tricorder and began to scan through the frequencies which I had on both previous occasions. Eventually, I hit the right frequency and just with the first time, with the smaller device, I felt a static charge emanating from the device and surrounding me. It wasn't pleasurable at all. It had felt as if I was on fire and frozen at the same time. Maybe I had seen it with my own eyes, or in my head? I have no idea. But I saw images flashing before me at a high rate of speed. Images of my own life as I both burned and froze at the same time, if that was even possible. The next thing I knew, I awoke in a room that I knew all to well. I was back at Starbase Earhart and looking up at my Aunt Claire, whom had stood over me laughing.

"Why is it, every time I see you. You are either asleep or in a daydream?"

"Claire?"

"Well, I'm not Captain Kirk. Am I?" She said with laughter, as she offered her hand to me, which I took and pulled myself to my feet.

"No, your not. Kirk was taller"

"Have you really been here all night, Ryder?"

"I guess, I have. What time is it?"

"Zero nine hundred…"

"I don't have much time. Excuse me Claire? There is someone I need to speak with" I called out, as I pulled myself to my feet and ran out of the room.

"Time, time for what. Mandy, time for what?"

Time, yes I know that I had time, almost three and a half years to act. But, I did have time to stop a friend, from making a huge mistake. That's why I ran as fast as I could, through the corridors of the starbase, pushing past both Junior and Senior officers alike, apologising as I continued to run through the corridors of the station. Finally, I had arrived at the Administrations Office, where the new Recruits whom had yet to accept or be assigned to a vessel, had lined up in single file to await their turn to state which vessel out of the few which had requested their assignment, they would take. The one thing was, one of the group had accepted an assignment which had destroyed his career, I knew that for a fact as I had read his file, three and a half years from now. But my mind was set on one person as I ran along the line, before stopping at the Ensign in the midst of the line of newly promoted Cadets.

"Jerry, Jerry?"

"Ryder. What the hell are you doing here? Come to brag about your cushy little Enterprise assignment"

"You don't know me Jerry. At all. Listen, take my advice please?" I called out, before whispering into his ear. "Don't accept the offer from the Colorado. I know the ship is new, but take another. Trust me on that"

"The only other offer I got, was the Solaris. Ryder, the Solaris is an Excelsior class. Colorado, is Akira, I would be nuts to…"

"Trust me. If not. On Stardate 51978? Take a day off, please"

"519...?" He replied, in shock.

"I've gotta go. Remember that date Jerry. Be somewhere else. Promise me on that…" I called out, as I ran down the line and pushed into an office.

"This, is a closed session Lieutenant" Barked a Commander, as he stood instantly from his seat.

"Mandy?"

"Jenny, don't accept the Arkansas assignment"

"I was just about to…"

"Jenny, listen to me. Take Enterprise, it's where you're meant to be. You need to be on that ship…"

"Lieutenant, this is highly irregular" Called out the Commander, as he reached for his communicator, to call for security.

"I wouldn't do that, Commander. When security arrives, I will just inform them of your little side projects. And you know what I mean. Jenny, take Enterprise and come with me to that ship, please?"

"Enterprise, what the hell are you…"

"Talking about? Commander, please leave the room. I think you know what I mean. Jenny, we need to talk…"

Before I was sent back into the past, I spoke with Jennifer about something that only she had known, something which she had never before told me. I had said, that I would never use my knowledge of what was to come, for my own needs? But, seeing that man, sat in that seat, was far to great an opportunity to let go, as was saving the career of one of my own classmates. After all, he was convicted of something that he had not done, on that ship and on that Stardate. Jennifer, had seen the look in my eyes at that time, which had displayed just about everything that I could not say. In that one moment, before the Commander had left, her choice was made. Enterprise.

Moving from the Administrations Office, to the quarters that I had been assigned until the Enterprise had arrived. I had laid everything out before Jennifer, and I mean everything. I told her everything that I had seen, and lived.

"You're damned crazy"

"You said that, you would say that. That's why you gave me proof. Something that only you know, and never told anyone else, not even me. Her name, was T'Mir…"

"How the hell do you know about T'Mir?" Jennifer asked, as she blushed deeply.

"Because you told me, over three years from now, when I was on Enterprise. I know about her, I know that you had a crush on her and it tore you apart when she didn't reciprocate those feelings. I also know that when you told her about your feelings, she never spoke to you afterwards. That's why you changed your career path from Medical, to Science to get away from her. Jenny, I know everything about you. Now I am asking you to not make a huge mistake which will change you into something darker. Your words, not mine. Now, if you come with me to Enterprise, we can stop what is about to happen, together as it should be…?"

Okay, I know I had sworn to Picard that I would never use my knowledge of the next almost four years for my own needs, but this is important to myself and what will one day happen to Commander Riker and my other self. I needed someone on my side to keep me on the path, I could not do it alone. The temptation would be far to great for me, I knew that right from the start. So anyway, shortening this portion of the my tale somewhat? Jennifer had finally agreed to join the crew of the Enterprise, and to assist me with what I must do in the future. Although there was not many available open spots for an Ensign in Planetary Sciences Division onboard? There was another way to get Jennifer onboard of the gallant starship Enterprise, as a married couple. It may seem strange to many, but it was the only way as I knew that Starfleet Command had rarely spilt up newly wedded couple. It was what they used to call, '_A Shotgun Wedding_', held that afternoon in the chapel on the Starbase and shortly before the starship had arrived. In the years which had followed, I must admit? I did use a little of what I had known to my advantage, effectively getting Jennifer promoted to Lieutenant Junior, I had sacrificed what would have been my own promotion to Senior Lieutenant, in favour of my wife. Call it my anniversary present, to Jenny. Within the six weeks which had followed, I had another opportunity to make Full Pip Lieutenant, I took it quickly. I had developed a reputation onboard of seemingly being in the area, when a situation had arisen.

The day of the accidental death of Commander Riker, and what had resulted in myself being thrown both forwards into the present, and another version of myself being thrown into the distant past, had swiftly approached as the Enterprise had orbited that very world, from my perspective once again. Everything had proceeded exactly as it had on that first time around, with one exception, it wasn't my first Away Mission Command, it was actually my fourth.

I saw Commander Riker, whom actually didn't like me very much at all? Stood before the short pylon which had once caused the accident which had killed him, in the first loop. Once again, I felt the build-up of a static charge flowing through me, once my Tricorder had activated the device as it had twice before, once by accident and the second time, with a reason. I had only a moment to act, before the energy wave would reopen the loop, once again.

Within a second, I had dropped the Tricorder onto the dirt covered ground and ran as fast as I could towards the Commander and pushed him out of the way. As we both fell onto the ground, in that one moment I could see anger echoing through his face, anger which had turned to shock when the energy wave exploded from the large column into the four pillars around the device.

"Sorry Commander? I detected a build up of energy…"

"Thank you, Lieutenant. What the hell happened?"

"It seems that the device, has activated itself somehow. Possibly due to my Tricorder, which now apparently…?" I said as we both stood slowly and looked towards the Starfleet issue device, burning away on the floor inside of the energy ribbons. "… Is now fried"

"So it would seem. If that energy bolt had hit either of us, I doubt we would be still standing"

"You, could say that Commander…"

The away mission had proceeded as planned, I had saved not only myself? But Commander Riker in the process. We spent six hours on the surface, examining the device which had shut itself down. My initial theory of the device, which I had once explained to Captain Picard in the now closed loop? Was originally intended to observe key points in history, history across the galaxy. Upon returning to the Enterprise, and briefing Captain Picard on what had happened below, Starfleet Command had ordered the entire star system to be quarantined, immediately. Accessible only by a Science vessel which had been dispatched to the system to study the device. Due to my own actions, which I had seen coming? I was offered a promotion to Lieutenant Commander. It hadn't felt right to accept the promotion, so I had turned it down in favour of remaining as Full Pip Lieutenant, I had even turned down a Commendation for my actions, as put forward by Commander Riker. The loop, was effectively closed by that moment, my future was now fluid. The mistakes are now my own to make, as is the prospect of earning my next promotion through my own actions, not through my knowledge of what was about to happen.

Upon returning to my quarters, a deep sense of Deja-Vu had rippled through me, this time I knew who I was, not lost with no memories. When I had entered, I saw bags packed before the door. I was livid at that moment. I was worried that Jennifer was about to leave me as Paul had, in a different loop.

"Jenny, Jenny?" I cried out, as I stepped over the bags and searched our shared quarters.

By the time I had re-entered the living room of our quarters, Jennifer stepped into our quarters with a slight smile upon her face and wearing civilian clothing.

"Jenny, what are you doing. Please don't tell me that you're leaving me?"

"Leaving? Not a chance. That's what you… not a chance. I've been planning this for weeks, I know how hard you've been working on starting a life for us both. What with everything which has happened since we've been married. We never had our Honeymoon so I've booked us, two weeks at Risa. We leave this evening in a shuttlecraft"

"Oh my god, when I saw the, I thought, never mind. Two weeks? Sounds like fun"

So, that is the story of how I broke just about every rule in the Temporal Relocation, Handbook. In doing so? I got the girl, the life and the career that I had always wanted. Of course, Temporal Investigations had eventually discovered what had happened, and tried their hardest to prove what I had done. But, I had prepared for that eventuality, both myself and Jennifer. The only person in the universe whom had known the truth. There was no evidence of time travel, nor my foresight anywhere to be found. Not even a temporal signature to prove my actions in any investigation, other than the ancient artefact which had deactivated itself, shortly after the loop had been closed. After our two week long honeymoon, Jennifer and I had returned to the Enterprise and back to duty, although the stain of a Temporal Investigation into my actions had remained open on my file? I know that it won't have an effect on my future career. I am just your average officer, whom had once made it a habit of being in the right place, at the right time.

You know what? I still do. It seems that somehow during both travels forwards and backwards, a little something, had remained behind inside of me. It's as if I can sense when something is about to happen. Whatever experience I had had, has changed me in someway that I have yet to understand. I began to see that on Risa. It is, interesting.

Oh, one little thing that I have to add. I not only changed the paths of myself, my beloved wife, the crew of the Enterprise which now includes Commander William Thomas Riker? But the path of Jerry, an old friend from the Academy. It was actually Jerry, whom had passed on what I had once said at Earhart to Temporal Investigations, a few weeks after Stardate 51978. He took my advice and took that day off, during which time? There was an explosion in the lab where he had worked, his console had overloaded, had he been sat at his station. It would have killed him. Instead? He survived.

As I had said earlier…

This is not a confession, but it is the truth.

Now, the reason why it is not an actual confession? As that the second time around, it had never happened.

Lieutenant Amanda Ryder-Wilcox.

Chief of the Planetary Sciences Division.

USS Enterprise NCC-1701-E.

The End.

Story By: Ariston 1.


End file.
